Find my own way

I keep myself busy every day. Moving on, at my own pace. Ups and downs, it`s all I can do right now. Not my choice, but I dealt with it. I`m fighting the “normal” with my every breath. But I`m so tired.

Even so, I have to keep going. I got my dreams, still. I have to reach them, one way or another. I said before I consider myself cynical and negative and unlucky. But life has a way to prove you wrong every time. There are things that fall into place as soon as they should. I can`t but watch them rearranging my life. In a good way.

I miss laughing for no good reason. I miss smiling at the girl across the room, knowing I`ll never see her again. I want to wake up every day by the sound of carriers. And be happy about them.

Part of me died 4 months ago. But something else began its life in the exact same moment. I couldn`t put my finger on what exactly was happening to me, so far. But I`m getting an idea. We`re all adapting to situations, to people, to places. The emptiness left behind by the death of a pet, or the moving around from city to city, these are just passing feelings that remain but just a memory. My life is just a collection of moments. I only needed to chose the ones I want to remember. The ones I want to define my whole life.

And the right people. The ones I need, not the ones I want. That will be the hardest part. Letting go and building from nothing. Well, not in some cases. Some already saved me, countless times.

Well, with these being said, I will see you at EECC this Saturday. I`ll be the guy with the camera, the big grin and the drools. I`ll be a kid again. If only for a day.

I have something to say: It`s better to burn out, than to fade away.


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